Mar 17 2024

Baelnorn Didn’t Record?!

I went to Amtgard and didn’t record a single video and I’m glad I didn’t! Why is that?. I fought and for me, I fought a lot and I loved it.

If you watch my YouTube channel you probably noticed I like to focus on foam fighting , like a lot. It’s not all the channel has to offer, but the majority of the videos are recordings of people foam fighting, but me, actually playing, no. It’s been a long time and very in frequently on top of that, at least these past several years.

I’m a self confessed stick jock, but you wouldn’t know it if saw me at LARP. I’m usually recording, taking pictures, volunteering or sitting on the side lines. That’s not always been the case. I joined LARP not for the RP but for the foam fighting.

My Start

My story is a fairly common one. Before I found a LARP organization I was hitting my friends in the yard with pvc pipes covered in insulation. Boy did I have some gnarly knuckle bruises!

Once I found Amtgard and got to fight more than my friends I was hooked like nothing before. I got a lot to say about my time in the game, but that isn’t this type of blog.

If you are interested in hearing more about my history I am working on some videos that covers more about who I am and what I’ve done in LARP. Being in the community for over 20 years I’ve worn many hats! Most of them weren’t even gnome hats!

So, why did I ever stop fighting? Well, simple answer, depression. I’ve struggled with it throughout my life. It’s caused me to stop doing a lot of things I loved, but lately things have been getting better.

Things Are Always Changing

The last several weeks things have been noticeably better when it comes to my mental health. Luckily extrinsic factors have changed over the last few months which I hope will allow me to capitalize on this change and let me ride it out as long as I can.

As of last fall, after two years, I was finally able to close my mother’s estate. That helped me find some closure after her passing. It also helped stabilize my financial situation. Then on top of all that I finally have stable housing for the first time in several years. Not having to worry if you’ll be homeless every month is pretty nice. It might be hard to realize how much of an affect that worry can have on you unless you’ve been in that position yourself.

Those three factors weighed huge on my mind and even when I might be feeling a little better, they would quickly drag me back into a state of constant worry and nihilism.

Then there is my physical health. I am of overweight and last year, at 315 pounds, I was at the heaviest I’ve ever been. On top of that I have Type 2 Diabetes and it was pretty out of control. But that too is changing

During the last half of last year I finally found the energy to work on dealing with my diabetes. I started Ozempic. I had some violent side affects when it came to nausea, but I stuck with it and the affects on my blood sugar was self-evident. After a few months the nausea wasn’t so bad and as of last week my A1C has dropped 3 whole points and I’m nearing pre-diabetic levels.

Additionally my weight has been dropping. Due to how the Ozempic has affected my digestive system I’m now down to 280 and it’s still dropping. By next month, I will be under 280 for the first time in I don’t even know how many years, probably at least ten.

Then last month I was able to do something that I attribute to this new mental and physical state that I now find myself in.

The Shake Up

I live an absurdly sedentary life style. For years I would find myself not leaving the apartment for days at a time. I did no physical activity. Bad health is self perpetuating. The more I did nothing the more I wanted to do nothing and my mental health and life stressors gave me no hope that anything would motivate me to do better.

As I mentioned, many things had been getting better, both my health and extrinsic factors. Still, while things were impvoving I was still mostly home bound and I did no physical activity. At that point it was the idea of the physical drain of just walking that kept me from going out.

Then in February I was lucky enough to have the chance to take a trip to London with my brother and good friend Dale. I no longer had the choice of driving to get to where I wanted to go. I had to walk. I went from no steps to 14,000 steps a day.

The first several days of the trip were a sort of mild living hell. It wasn’t just the physical pain and exhaustion of actually using my leg muscles, but also the mental push to keep going when I desperately wanted to stop, But by the end of the first week things started to change.

My muscles started to get used to the effort and I even started to see more definition in my calves. I became less concerned with the distances we walked and my mind was no longer telling me I was to exhausted to continue. Don’t get me wrong, my muscles were sore the whole trip, but they became less so and my mental perception of walking changed the more I did it.

The Effect

When I got home things felt different. The idea of walking to the coffee shop didn’t seem like an epic journey filled with pain and suffering. It was just quick jaunt. If I could walk across a whole borough of London, a few blocks were nothing.

The trip had not only been a physical jump start, giving me more leg strength and endurance, It also changed my perspective of what I was still capable of doing. It was an eye opener.

That change, with the addition of the extrinsic factors and my physical health improving was enough that when my depression lessened I was able to capitalize on it.

Why I Started Fighting Again

So, with every thing I stated you’d probably think that I started fighting again because I was inspired to have some fun you’d be wrong. I fought because of my anxiety.

The place I’ve found myself in did inspire me to go to our local fighter practice. Well, I say local, but for me it’s a 25 mile drive. I hadn’t been for years and Critias had managed to snag our group an actual dojo for us to use and for free too! I needed to check that out.

The specific moment I decided to go was when Louie suggested I try recording fights at the fighter practice. I said fuck it, I’ll make the extra drive and so I did, but when I got there, equipment in hand, the dojo was still being used by the previous group. I felt to apprehensive about setting up my equipment while there were non-LARPers there, plus it was a new situation and place. I felt very out of place.

So, when people started fighting, I chose to wait to record and I picked up my short sword. Then when the other people left, which I hadn’t even noticed, I didn’t put down my sword and I kept fighting. A few hours later I was out of breath and all sweaty

All my life I had heard about the runners high, the state where you do so much exercise you get a high from the endorphins surging through you. I had only ever felt that once, back when I was in University and I was doing Aikido and going to the gym on a regular basis. One time while running on the track, I finally felt it, the runners high. It was pretty cool.

I didn’t feel it at fighter practice but I did have a lot of fun and I walked away wanting to do it more.

Going Forward

So, where does this leave me? It leaves me cautiously optimistic. I don’t truly believe in the idea when everything is going well it’s inevitable that something bad is around the corner but it’s still hard to shake that feeling.

I’ve been here before and I’ve pushed my self to fast, overcommitting on things, then having a mental dive and having to put up with my commitments, furthering my mental slide and dragging me into a state of despair. Which, if you were not aware, sucks.

I’ve decided that I will continue to go to fighter practice, at least once a month. While there I will fight and additionally I intend to stream it. I don’t know how well that will work or if I’ll do it on Facebook or on YouTube but next time I go I’ll give it a try.

On Saturdays, the main day for our Amtgard park, I won’t be committing myself to any fighting, I still need to be able to have time to record things and those will be the main days I do so. Still, you might find me fighting on the sidelines or joining in the occasional ditch when time allows.

You can see my Tier 2 (Rock Gnomes) and 3 (Tinker Gnomes) supporters on my Patreon Supporters page as well as find out how to become a Patron yourself.

Feb 14 2024

Baelnorn’s Journey to SKBC 2024 – A Foam Fighting Adventure

YouTube player
Table Of Contents
  1. My Foam Fighting Saga
  2. The SKBC Chronicles
  3. Rallying Support for SKBC 2024
  4. Your Impact on the SKBC 2024 Quest
  5. Envisioning the Future
Donate Here!

Hey, it’s Baelnorn here! You might know me from those foam-sword battles I’m always posting on YouTube. Well, folks, it’s time to level up our game. I’m on a quest to hit up Sword Knight Boot Camp 2024 in the glittering oasis of Las Vegas. This isn’t just a meetup; it’s the ultimate gathering of foam-fighting aficionados, a place where legends come to play and learn.

I’ve launching a GoFundMe to make this epic journey possible because, let’s face it, adventuring to Vegas for the ultimate foam fighting experience isn’t exactly a walk in the park financially. But here’s the cool part: every contribution brings us closer to sharing the SKBC magic with the whole world. If you love diving into the thick of foam combat as much as I do, then this is our chance to make some noise together.

Join me in this blog as I spill the beans on my journey through the world of foam fighting, give you the inside scoop on SKBC, and share how you can help turn this dream into a reality. Let’s dive in!

My Foam Fighting Saga

Let me take you back to where it all started. Imagine me at 15, armed with nothing but a homemade boffer sword crafted from PVC and packing tape. That was my gateway into the wild world of foam fighting. Stumbling upon Amtgard opened up a whole new realm for me, a place where my passion for swinging foam swords wasn’t just accepted; it was celebrated.

My first journey to SKBC in 2006 was nothing short of transformative. There I was, a bundle of nerves, choosing a class led by Derek Roth simply because he was a familiar face in a sea of unknowns. If I could sit down with my younger self, I’d say, “Step out of your comfort zone. Learning from those you don’t know, is a often a valuable lesson.” That experience taught me about the value of new perspectives and the richness of diving into unfamiliar waters.

Fast forward to 2022, and I’m back at SKBC, this time behind the lens, aiming to capture the essence of this incredible gathering for all of you. It’s been a journey of evolution, from eager student to passionate chronicler. Sharing videos like Peter the Quick’s dual-wielding mastery and Devry’s and Zander’s Polearm class, has not only brought me closer to the community, but has also highlighted the unquenchable thirst for knowledge and growth in our community.

The SKBC Chronicles

SKBC is more than just an event; it’s the heart of the foam fighting community, a place where warriors and scholars of the sport gather to share, learn, and battle. My first SKBC was a revelation, a moment that expanded my world and introduced me to the broader community we’re all a part of.

As SKBC 2024 approaches, I find myself buzzing with excitement. It’s not just about honing my skills or capturing the action; it’s about reconnecting with the community, making new friends, and sharing those experiences with you. This year, I’m diving in with the goal of not just witnessing, but truly participating in the magic of SKBC, bringing back stories, lessons, and a little bit of that Las Vegas sparkle to our community.

Rallying Support for SKBC 2024

Alright, folks, let’s talk brass tacks. Attending SKBC 2024 isn’t just about hopping on a plane and showing up. There’s a whole adventure’s worth of planning, budgeting, and rallying the troops – that’s you, by the way – to make this quest possible. Here’s the deal: the trials of Vegas, accommodations (thanks to Minerva and Critias for covering lodging!), grub to keep up my energy, and the event fee itself are part of the journey.

Why am I embarking on this quest, you might ask? Well, it’s twofold. Personally, I’m on a mission to break out of my shell, meet new faces, and forge lasting friendships in the foam fighting community. For the channel, it’s all about capturing that juicy content you love: the epic battles, the insider tips from top fighters, and the kind of camaraderie that only SKBC can offer. Every dollar raised gets us closer to sharing the spirit and excitement of SKBC with everyone who can’t be there in person.

So, here’s where you come in. Supporting this GoFundMe means you’re not just helping me get to Vegas; you’re helping to keep our community vibrant, connected, and growing. You’re ensuring that the tales of SKBC 2024 aren’t just legends whispered among a few but stories shared across our global community. Plus, if we hit our goals, I’m planning to extend the trip to cover even more foam-fighting goodness.

This is your invitation to be part of something bigger. Every contribution, no matter how small, helps fuel this journey and the content it will inspire. Let’s band together and make SKBC 2024 an adventure we can all share.

Your Impact on the SKBC 2024 Quest

Keeping you all in the loop is key to this whole endeavor. I’ll be sharing updates, behind-the-scenes looks, and live moments from the road to SKBC and throughout the event. And here’s a special twist: backers will get a say in which classes and events we cover. Want to see more dual-wielding action or get the lowdown on tactical foam fighting? Your wish is my command.

This campaign is more than just fundraising; it’s about building something together. By contributing, sharing, and engaging, you’re helping to shape the journey and the stories that come out of it. I’m all about making this experience as interactive and community-focused as possible. After all, this channel isn’t just mine; it’s ours.

Envisioning the Future

Looking beyond SKBC 2024, the horizon is filled with possibilities. Continuing to dive into the world of foam fighting, sharing knowledge, and celebrating our community are just the beginning. I’ve got plans brewing for more in-depth content, exploring new ways to showcase our sport, and maybe even organizing some meetups of our own.

SKBC 2024 is just the next step in a journey that we’re all on together. It’s about more than just one event; it’s about setting the stage for the future of our channel and our community. So, let’s make it count.

Looking beyond SKBC 2024, the horizon is filled with possibilities. Continuing to dive into the world of foam fighting, sharing knowledge, and celebrating our community are just the beginning. I’ve got plans brewing for more in-depth content, exploring new ways to showcase our sport, and maybe even organizing some meetups of our own.

SKBC 2024 is just the next step in a journey that we’re all on together. It’s about more than just one event; it’s about setting the stage for the future of our channel and our community. So, let’s make it count.

Click here to Contribute!

Dec 31 2023

Baelnorn’s Year in Review 2023

Table Of Contents
  1. YouTube
  2. Streaming
  3. Writing in 2023
  4. A Bit of Analytics

2023 is almost over, which means it’s time for me to reflect on my channel over the last year. It’s become something of a tradition that started in 2019. I’ve found it invaluable for seeing my progress over the past several years and this year is no different. I was feeling very down about my content till I looked at my past year’s data. Despite the end of the year being rather rough for content, the year was a net positive!

YouTube

Goals From 2022

2023 was looking to be the year of YouTube for me. By the end of 2022, I had been releasing weekly content since April of that year. I had also played around with YouTube Shorts, mostly giving up, till I had some success at the end of 2022. That led me to want to set a goal of releasing more Shorts in 2023.

I wanted to continue my Let’s LARP series, where I impart some of my knowledge or cover an interesting LARP topic in an informative video. I also wanted to do another season of LARP Chats, a LARP interview series, and do at least four more narrative videos.

How It Turned Out

2023 was certainly the year of YouTube for me. I managed to post weekly videos from April 2022 to October 2023. Even then, I only missed a few weeks hear and there during the last few months of the year.

While I did produce season two of LARP Chats, it had fewer episodes than the first season. I also didn’t do as much work on the Let’s LARP series as I expected.

The biggest impact on the growth of my channel was the YouTube Shorts. I have no doubt that it was due to posting two shorts a week that led to such an increase in watch time and views (See analytics below).

I do not think I kept the motivation I had at the end of 2022. It carried me far this year, but I didn’t see the personal growth in my content that I had been hoping for. I think the content improved and I learned, but I have been faltering the last several months.

I was just one video shy of my goal of four narrative videos. I had the fourth one recorded, but I won’t have it out before the end of 2023.

Goals For 2024

Till I compared 2022’s analytics to 2023, I felt like I was ending 2023 with zero progress and that is absolutely not true. I am not starting over from nothing, but I do need to build back up some habits.

In the first several months of 2024, I imagine I’ll be getting back into the habit of creating content on a faster cadence again. I want to create more Let’s LARP and LARP Chat videos.

I can’t think of setting any other goals beyond getting back on track with creating content. That is my first priority. This of course includes getting back to releasing YouTube Shorts on a regular cadence as well.

Streaming

Goals From 2022

I had a lot of hope for streaming in 2023. I wanted to continue streaming Baelnorn and Friends and add clips of the shows on my YouTube. That was my main focus but I also had some secondary goals

I also wanted to do more Dungeons and Dragons creation while streaming and get back to my writing streams. I also was considering moving my streaming to YouTube.

How It Turned Out

Streaming did not turn out all that well. I only managed to do a few Baelnorn and Friends streams before I had trouble organizing them. I also made the move to YouTube streaming, it was the right move. It has helped my channel’s watch time. I was also able to start making clips of those streams.

I also streamed several sessions of creating D&D content, but that petered out after the first few months. I don’t think I did any writing streams in 2023

Goals For 2024

My only goal for 2024 is to get back to streaming Baelnorn and Friends. I think it will be great for the channel and will help diversify the content further. Other than that I don’t expect to get back into the streaming sphere.

Writing in 2023

Goals From 2022

I was very optimistic for my writing in 2023. I wanted to finish the rough draft of my novel by the end of the year. I also wanted to finish a short story I had started in 2022 and finish another short story in 2023

Additionally, I wanted to start publishing D&D content on my Patreon on a monthly basis.

How It Turned Out

My lack of writing in 2022 followed me into 2023. I hardly touched my novel. I did one edit pass but didn’t do any writing. I also didn’t keep up on the D&D content. I published one supplement, although I did write enough for more than that. I just have managed to do the proper formatting and finding pictures I can use.

Goals For 2024

I would love to finish the rough draft of my novel in 2024. I think it’s possible, but I’ve also been pretty uninspired for a while now and I don’t now if that will change or not.

I will continue to write D&D, as it’s a natural byproduct of my running my two Dungeon and Dragons campaigns. Hopefully, I’ll get to the point where where will I publish more supplements. One of the big sticking points is getting artwork for them.

A Bit of Analytics

I thought the growth in 2022 was pretty good, but it has nothing on the growth of 2023. You can see below that there was 372 % growth in views in 2022 but in 2023 there was growth of 591% from the previous year. That has to do with the introduction of Shorts on my channel.

At the end of 2022 there was a growth of 337% in watch time from 2021. 2023 saw a growth of 140%. The growth wasn’t as big as 2022, but considering there was very little on the channel in 2021, this makes sense. Both the Shorts and moving to YouTube Streaming has helped grow the channel’s watch time.

I gained 44 Subscribers in 2021, 150 in 2022, and a whopping 322 in 2023. At the end of the year, I’m sitting at 618 subscribers. Less than 400 short of the goal of 1,000 subscribers, the amount needed for monetization of the channel. I think it’s reasonable that I will get to 1k subs by the end of 2024

2021 Year End YouTube Analytics

2022 Year End YouTube Analytics

2023 Year End YouTube Analytics

You can see my Tier 2 (Rock Gnomes) and 3 (Tinker Gnomes) supporters on my Patreon Supporters page as well as find out how to become a Patron yourself.